Don't look at ME like that..! It's not MY fault..!

Amble, everyone! Amble for your lives! The great New Zealand carnivorous snail is coming!

The Second World Wart

[Father to son] Remember son - when life throws you a lemon, make lemonade. .. / [Fly] Where'd you get to son? / I'm by the lemon tree dad! / Kid - I learned this from the humans. "When life throws you a lemon - / SQUITCH!

65 MILLION YEARS AGO: Relax everyone, it's just an asteroid. Asteroids are natural. / 79 AD: Don't worry Pompeii, it's only a volcano! Volcanoes are perfectly natural..! / APRIL 14, 1912: Good news everybody - seems we hit an iceberg! We're sure lucky that icebergs are natural..! / TODAY: Droughts, floods, wild weather, rising sea levels, the whole climate change thing .. . all natural. / Experts through the ages

A boy in a not-quite parallel Universe left a ball of string sitting around. A dog started to gnaw at it, but then knocked it through a crack in the pavement and in to our solar system, where it was the size of a planet, and made of superstring..! / Astronomers saw it approaching and excitedly held press-conferences. People laughed and joked at first, but then grew fearful, because it looked as if the ball was on a collision course with Earth! / As it turned out, the ball passed very close to Earth but missed us. It passed right between us and the Moon. People laughed again and took photos as the ball moved off into the distance of space. .. / Unfortunately, a trailing strand snagged some outcrops on the Moon, and the thread started to unravel as the ball moved further away. As the moon orbited the earth, it began to wind us up with progressively more thread! / All the string in the stratosphere meant that sunsets were quite pretty at first, but soon our light was blocked out, and then the three inner planets all got tangled up with the sun, and we all died. / Which was a real pity, because the giant dog came after the ball, and he was really worth seeing. .. / Moral: be careful where you leave your string.

Tips for saving the planet, #12. If you come across a baby meteorite, don't go anywhere near it. You might attract its mother.

30 JUNE 1908 / Nicola Tesla during the time of the Siberian "Tunguska Event"

That was quite a storm we had last night! Did you hear that rain..? / .. .I wonder how the guttering's holding up..?

You know how the Universe is receding away from us at an accelerating rate? / Uh..huh? / As if a powerful force is stretching the very fabric of spacetime? / "Dark Energy" / Yeah. Well I've just figured out what that is. / Yeah right, Melvin..! / Imagine you're on a beach, and a TSUNAMI TROUGH arrives. What happens first? / All the water is sucked out to sea..? / Mmmm. Well it seems that a huge higher-dimensional ENERGY-WAVE is rapidly sweeping in through our cosmological horizon. .. / You mean..? / Yup..! It turns out that so-called "Dark Energy" is nothing more complex than spacetime drawback caused by the COSMIC TSUNAMI OF DEATH. ..

A Cosmic Tsunami of Death..? That's ridiculous..! / Such a huge energy-wave would need an IMPOSSIBLY massive external event to set it off! There's NO PRECENDENT! / Give me just ONE EXAMPLE of a huge flood of mass-energy suddenly appearing out of nowhere! / Hmmm. You mean like some sort of "BIG BANG"..?